What is Your Plan?

For the record, I am really not a political person. Some of you are probably laughing at that sentence because leading up to the election, and certainly after it, I’ve posted some pretty political things. But in the grand scheme of my life, and looking back on the past 30 years, I really am not that political nor am I very outspoken about politics or “taboo” type topics. I will admit that as I have gotten older, I’ve certainly become more liberal and more apt to share my feelings on issues I find important (marriage rights, sexual assault, immigration etc). 8 days ago everything changed and let me tell you there has been a spark lit under my behind that is calling me to take all my privileges, all my experiences, and all my ability to be an advocate and do something good with it. Some of you will never understand the immense fear and grief felt by so many people last week (and that will continue to be felt for the next four years) and some of you will think I was overreacting when I sat in my bathroom at 9:30pm last Tuesday sobbing like I have never sobbed before. I’m not mad at my friends for however they voted, everyone has the right to vote however they please and for whomever they please. I clearly disagree with who some of my friends voted for, but just like those friends have the right to have voted for who they did for the reasons they voted, I have the right to disagree. My biggest issue right now is the fact that so many people I love are living in fear and whether or not you believe that fear is justified, that fear is real and we all need to acknowledge that our friends, our neighbors, our family members, and our fellow citizens have real, immense, and in my opinion, justified feelings right now.

Today, I sat and spoke with a woman who moved to the US from a middle eastern country. I listened as she shared with me through tears what she has experienced leading up to the election and after the election. I heard the fear through her voice and felt the cry for help through her tears. I had to listen to the sexist and xenophobic things that have been said to her. If you think the media is over exaggerating what is happening in the country right now then fine, believe that, but as your friend on facebook, I am telling you that whether you want to believe it or not, it is happening. This is not okay. And just saying “stop it” is not enough. This is a time when action speaks louder than words.

Over the course of my time working with college students I’ve sat through and led many trainings on what we refer to as bystander intervention. The short version of bystander intervention is that when you see something that is wrong, something that feels off, or something that could lead to danger, you intervene and help. Your action can stop the wrong that is happening. And just like what we teach college students (mainly around the topic of sexual assault and sexual violence) I think we need to teach each other right now. If you see something that is wrong, if you hear someone say something that is hurtful, sexist, racist, etc, then do something; say something; prove to me that you do no stand for what has been tied to and attributed to our President-elect. We have the power to be kind. We have the power to build bridges. We have the power to advocate for those around us.

You don’t have to make some grand gesture. Find what matters to you and use your voice to support it and protect it. Be kind. Be understanding. Be accepting of the way those around you may be feeling whether you agree with those feelings or not. Put yourself in their shoes. I know that is my plan for the next day, the next week, the next four years and beyond. So what is your plan?